Passion(s) of Motherhood

Growing up I always knew that I wanted to be a Mommy. I've always wanted four children and to this day my hopes are still there. I wanted to give someone love, and provide the neccasties of life for them. I never in a million years thought that I would become a {single} Mom at the age of 18. I was scared yet hopeful and excited. I wasn't sure if I was fit to be a Mother at such a young age. It was scary but even more scary when a doctor told me that I should consider adoption. My heart sank at the realization that someone else thought I may be incapable. So, just as I in my prideful spirited ways choose to do, I proved them wrong.

Not because I wanted that sastisfaction but because I knew I could love. I knew that my heart was full of so much love and passion for something but I just never knew what until I held my baby girl in my arms. 

She was amazing and beautiful. She was exactly what my life needed in that very moment. For the next five years, I provided and nourished a child in every possible way that my Motherly heart knew how. It may be prideful of me but at this time in my life, I can look back on that part of my life and call it a blessing. 

I needed her as much as she needed me. She was a gift from God, that pulled me back into a reality that I had lost so long before. Her blonde waves and adult like language pulled the strength from me that I never knew was possible. She taught me to be more patient and to love with all I have. Her innocent heart taught me to be more curtious and kind. She taught me what life was all about, all while I was trying to give her one.

As the years passed and I found the man who became my Husband. Things changed and we added a new addition into our family. This time it was different, but in a good way. My world still revolves around my children. But my new passion, is my Husband. I do not play this role as easily as I once hoped I would. Although, I am becoming more certain that we called to love our Husbands first and our children second. It's a hard bit to chew on, but the more that I strive to surround him with love the better my Motherly roles play out. The snuggles in bed may last for what seems like forever somedays. The never ending wrestling matches may go on for hours. The PonyElla book that I've been reading for 4 years may get old. But as I think about the days when our children are grown, and are in their path of marriage I pray they can look back to the example I have led for them. That is what is most important to me. 

I strive to be a Godly spouse and Mother. Yet, I could never in a million years even come close to saying I'm near perfection in that aspect. Although, I do know where my heart lies and that is in the glory of his name. Somedays, I feel as if I can just make it through the day without being hateful or crude I am doing well. Then others I think to myself how can I show my children how to be a good parent and spouse. I want them to see that they can play both roles equally, and both roles just as fabously. 

I want my daughter to see that I can give her and her brother love while I am loving their Father. I want Bryar to see how a wife should be, so he remembers as he searches for his own. Charli may be young but the girl hears and sees all around her. She takes it to heart and I pray that while she may be eavesdropping, she takes in the amount of time that I give to each of them in each role of my life. That my days are spent loving, providing and nourishing as Mother but they are also spent showing my children how a Wife loves her Husband. 

This Mother's Day I can truly say that I am overly blessed. My family is coming closer together. Our union is in a precious stage and for that I am incredibly grateful.

As a Mother, I'm not sure I can feel anymore blessed than that alone. 

This Mother's Day I would like to say thank you to all women who make a difference in someone's life. You each play an amazing role in caring, loving and supporting. Thank you for loving when it's easy and most of all when its hard. Thank you for simply being you, and as unique as you are. We need more of YOU in our world. Take this day to relax, and reflect on the Mother you are or even have been this past year. 

This is your day and I pray it's full of sweet blessings.