I never thought in a million years that at the age of 2 years and 9 months, my daughter would already be asking who and where her "Daddy" is. Let me first say, that this isn't a blog of pity or wanting someone to feel sorry. But a blog of how amazing my daughter is to already know that something isn't right, and how she deals and copes already. She is such an amazing little girl, although some days I want sit back and cry in the bathroom floor because of how bad her temper, attitude, and simply terrible twos can be. She amazes me daily with how smart, creative and imaginative she is. Last weekend, I came in pretty late from visiting with a friend and she woke up and came to my bed to "snuggie" with me as we always seem to do anymore. As we were lying there she turned towards me being very pouty and asked "whose my daddy?" Immediately tears came to my eyes, so I tried burying my face down in the pillow to where she couldn't see. I told her that we were different than a lot of families but I was her Mommy and Daddy, and tried explaining how cool of a job that it is. So then sadly, she said "So we we we not got any familyy?" Oh gracious.. I quickly replied, " Yes, baby! We have Nana, Aunt Ashy, Pa, Maw, Pops, Aunt Vicki, Aunt Nicki, Aylee, Drew...(so on)" She was good with than and causally said "okay" and rolled over to sleep.
I thought to myself how close of a call that was. The next afternoon after lunch she came running to me from her room and screamed "DADDY!" and it honestly startled me. I didn't know if someone was behind me or what! lol. Then she jumped in my arms. haha. I admit it, it was completely my fault that this occurred. So I had to explain to her that I do the role as both, but for her to ONLY call me Mommy. Now, she is in the phase of asking if everyone is her Dad. Oh help me! I was looking at pictures of my soon to be Hubby (Chris Young, yes the country music singer)...JUST KIDDING and she wanted to know if that was him. Which I can honestly see the reason behind her asking. His facial hair, looks like a guy that I dated for about 8 months, between her being 13 months to just after her turning 2. She grew very attached to him. He was a great person, and I hated to separate the connection the two had made between one another. She remembers his name very well, and still tells people, that her Daddy is him and he is at work. I am praying that this is just a stage, and she will come to the understanding of everything at a later time. In fact, I am very sure that she will. My Mom helped me understand my situation of not having my "real" Father around, and I never looked back to try and find him my self. I think that children that grow up with just one parent or those that never knew of either are very special people. I know that my heart gets stubborn sometimes, but I can love someone like nothing else matters in the world. I cannot wait to find love and someone for Charli. I know the Lord is making me wait, and when this person comes along he is going to be simply wonderful. I'm ecstatic for my future prince charming.....just...would you please hurry up?
p.s.
Prince Charming as if you couldn't tell already I am very and I mean very impatient! It goes nicely with all of my other oh so lovely qualifications as your princess =)
5 comments:
Charli knows she is loved and thats what really matters!
aww, girl I'll definitely be praying for you!! that must be tough... but you are probably the strongest woman I know! and I'm sure it's just a phase that Charli Beth is going through.
I can sort of relate myself.i had a mom but i lived with my grandparents they were the ones that raised me.my mom was there till i was 7 she moved out and left me with them because she knew i would be better with them.i still saw her daily but to a extent she was more a friend than a mom.i never knew my dad he wasn't around after getting what he wanted from my mom i know very little about him once mom told me after i was 18.and i have never looked for him.i turned out fine if not better.although i cant relate to the single mom thing because i live with alyssa's daddy we arent married but i do have a close friend that is a single mom.so i know it can be hard.i think you are a strong person and you seem to have a strong/great family to help you.i think its just a phase for Charli to ask because she is at the age she can tell a difference.anyway i've wrote a lot lol,and although we dont know eachother i am a good friend and a nice,good person always up for getting to know someone and be friends.so if you ever want to talk just get ahold of me on myspace.take care.
This post brought tears to my eyes. But not really sad ones, mostly I got emotional thinking about how strong of a person you are. That is such a great thing to have thought of to tell her you are both. Because you ARE!! You are everything that little girl will ever need. And if one day someone comes along that is worthy of you two, than that is just icing on the cake! :)I agree that growing up like this builds character. I was taken from my mom at seven and then she died when I was ten. I never knew my dad and wouldn't know if he were alive or dead to this day. I just think that Charli is so blessed by all the other people in her life that love her so much. That is what she is going to hang on to. That is what I always did. Keep up the great work, Paige!
Charli is one of the luckiest little girls in the world to have such a wonderful Mom. She is asking you questions because she is so smart and hears other little ones talk about their Daddy's...you give her all the right answers. She is fine and will be as long as she has you. Keep God first and everything else will fall in place as he has in his plan.
It will take a real man to be her Daddy and your husband...you never know when or where but it will happen. Pray for the right one.
Love you, Momma
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